


The Merchant of... Breakfast?

by DancouMaryuu



Category: Ed Edd n Eddy
Genre: Gen, Humor, Mounting disaster, One Shot, Pancakes, Three Word Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-13 06:28:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15358284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DancouMaryuu/pseuds/DancouMaryuu
Summary: "No, Eddy! I will not engage in further arms manufacturing! My conscience forbids it! GOOD. DAY." Edd slammed the door.Eddy turned to Ed. "Sheesh! All I wanted was some syrup!"





	The Merchant of... Breakfast?

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as a means of challenging myself. I tried to write a story based on three random words. The words for this story were "operation," "breakfast," and "weapon."

Edd stood, horrified at what he had wrought.

Had the people behind the Manhattan Project felt this way after Hiroshima and Nagasaki?

Had Alfred Nobel reacted this way after hearing what people thought of him and how he had created dynamite?

The cruel irony of this was, Edd was a pacifist himself.

If only he had had the sense to stop. If only he had said no to Eddy about finding a way to make a pancake that could expand while being cooked. Eddy was looking to repeat his attempt at making the world's biggest pancake.

Ooooh, Edd had been too enthusiastic about seeing this as an engineering challenge!

But still, there were moments where Edd could have stopped - but didn't.

He could have realized the horrific potential of the substance he had accidentally created when it swelled out of the frying pan and began to engulf Mother's kitchen - but he didn't.

He should have seen the possibilities for disaster when Eddy began selling "One-Drop-Pancakes" (the idea of which was that a drop of Edd's new mix would create a regular-sized pancake) - but he didn't.

He should have intervened when he noticed that One-Drop-Pancakes were selling like... well, hotcakes - but he didn't.

He should have reacted with more horror when the Eds noticed Jonny stuffing an "Imported Canadian Squirt Gun" (why hadn't the Cul-de-sac reverted to calling them turkey basters already?!) with One-Drop-Pancake mix - but he didn't.

It was only when Eddy began to dream up 'Operation Breakfast Bomb' that the first seeds of doubt began to take root in Edd's mind.

Alas, by the time the doubt had grown enough to defy Eddy's wishes, the horrific creamy blimp that was the ungodly hybrid of Eddy's brother's 'El Mongo Stink Bomb' and the One-Drop-Pancake Mix was complete.

Now, Eddy had a makeshift superweapon - but no use for it.

Originally, Eddy considered auctioning the "B-Bomb" off. Thankfully, Edd had regained enough reason to point out that if the bomb was sold, one of the kids would most likely use it on the Eds. Using it on the kids was no option either, for a reprisal was inevitable. Now, even Eddy began to fear what he and the other Eds had created

So, it was decided that the B-Bomb would be floated over to the rubbish tip north of the Cul-de-sac, where it could be detonated safely and (relatively) discreetly.

Alas, Mother Nature had other ideas.

Summer rains; you can never predict them...

The storm had been enough to blow the buoyant B-Bomb skyward. The Eds had held onto the tow-rope to no avail. The three were hurled up with it. Eventually, Edd and Eddy had been blown off completely. Eddy had been first, falling straight through the roof of Kevin's shed. Edd fell off shortly after, bouncing off of Nazz's trampoline and smashing through her wall, right into her bathroom. Only cartoon physics saved him.

Thankfully, Nazz hadn't been in her bathroom at the time. Edd had more pressing issues. He ran to one of Nazz's windows and saw the B-Bomb hurling toward the heavens. Ed was still clutching the tow-rope. Edd was about to yell at him to let go before the bomb got any higher...

But then lighting struck the flapjack explosive, and all hell broke loose.

* * *

Edd now stood inside Nazz's front door, gaping at the batter-y destruction all around him.

A giant pancake now covered the centre of the Cul-de-sac.

Pancakes of varying sizes now lay strewn about the houses, trees, and lawns.

The falling flapjacks had flattened cars, smashed through roofs, and knocked down trees.

It was bedlam - breakfast in bedlam!

And it wasn't even the morning...

"Double-D...?" Edd looked back toward Nazz, approaching behind him. The Cul-de-sac's resident cool girl had been unnervingly calm throughout the whole episode.

"Nazz..." Edd began to weep, "I'm a monster...!"


End file.
